One of the things I deal with is feeling illegitimate. What I mean by that is I wonder if I can actually have an opinion that is worthwhile. If I can participate in conversations, parent my children and appear confident at all without someone looking at me like I'm an alien or like I'm 5 pretending to be 35. I still treat myself like I'm 15, not like I'm in my 30s.
So I've been working on it. Self talk is supposed to be one of the ways to do that.
So one day I'm standing in my closet picking out my clothes for the day. My husband and I have a fairly large closet and we each have a portion. My husband has to walk through my side to get out.
I also need to mention that the light is on my side of the closet.
So, I'm standing there, particularly anxious about something for that day and my confidence level in dealing with that situation, saying to myself over and over, "I'm legitimate. I'm legitimate. I'm legitimate." Over and over.
My husband, also in the closet, walks out of the closet, walks right past me and shuts the light out.
I WAS STANDING RIGHT THERE!
How ironic was that?
I said, "Hey! I'm still in here!"
His mind was apparently elsewhere and he just didn't realize. It's almost stunning the coincidence of that though. He apologized and we both shared a laugh over the irony of the whole thing.
Can you find any humor in dealing with yourself today? I hope so because sometimes it just gets too serious.
Here's to working on ourselves and finding joy even in that.